You Are A Gigantic Asshole If You Need To Eat Outside At A Restaurant This Badly

I don't know where this is taking place, or what kind of restaurant this is, but what I do know is that these are some of the biggest assholes on Planet Earth (aside from Novak Djokovic). I know we're all dying to go out to eat again. We've all had enough of eating our own shitty cooking at home or ordering Postmates, but come on people. What are we doing here? 

With every state progressing through the stages of re-opening we're getting different levels of outdoor dining starting back up again. NYC today is starting outdoor seating, which is exciting. The hunger is there to get a meal at a restaurant and feel normal again, but that doesn't mean put a condom over your head and suffocate. How could that possibly be worth it? There's no point you can present to me that will convince me this is acceptable behavior. If you're caught dead at one of these tables you should be ashamed of yourself. Some people said it was raining outside and that's why they did this. That still doesn't make it okay. Just go home if it's raining and come back the next day. 

I also have several questions. For starters, how do you breathe in there? Seems rather important, but incredibly hard to do with plastic draped over you. What happens when someone farts? Does everyone just die on the spot? How is it not a million degrees under that thing in the summer? I understand that we're all chomping at the bit to get a bite to eat outside of our homes, but no one needs to go somewhere this badly.

If you do this I hate you, it's that simple. If your brain tells you this is a good rational idea then you need to be placed on an island far away from civilization where you are to wait out your remaining years. There's actually something wrong with you and all decision making should be removed from your person effective immediately.